When grief grips us, we can be desperate to receive a signal from our loved ones who’ve crossed over. We may think that if we don’t sense anything, they are nowhere around us.

But this isn’t necessarily so.

A main reason we may be unaware of our dear ones is that they know their presence could slow our healing and, therefore, our ability to move forward. I believe those we love on the other side will always visit us in our times of need. But, if making themselves known to us inflames our raw wounds, they wouldn’t risk it. A talented medium I know had lamented for years that she couldn’t feel her crossed over mother. No matter how hard she tried nothing happened. Now, as she looks back over that period, she realizes she wasn’t ready; every time she’d looked at a photo of her mom, she cried. “Mom knew I couldn’t handle sensing her. She waited until I was ready,” she recently told me.

Tips for sensing your loved ones

  1. If the grief is still fresh, don’t get upset that you don’t sense them.
  2. Relax and try not to dwell on whether they are present. The times I’ve encountered those dear to me have been when I least expect it.
  3. Be open and aware of nuances, such as sudden sensations of love or thoughts unrelated to your current stream of consciousness popping into your mind.
  4. Pay attention to your dreams. Very vivid dreams where your senses are heightened can indicate they have visited you.
  5. Talk aloud to them on occasion.
  6. Send them your love and gratitude. Open yourself to positive emotions and the happy memories you made with them.

Other ways spirits let us know they’re around

Many of my friends have had personal experiences that convinced them they’d been visited by those important to them. Here are some examples.

Months after my friend’s husband departed, she woke in the middle of the night to feel her foot being tugged on under the covers—something her husband used to do to let her know he was home.

An acquaintance shared a message with me from his departed wife that she’d left on his cell phone. The voice was strange—it had a unique timbre and cadence—and didn’t quite sound of this world, but it was feminine. I could clearly hear, “I love you.”

Yet another friend told me that she and her mother used to pick up pennies they found during their day. It was almost a ritual. Since her mother passed, she’s found pennies everywhere in greater quantities than ever before.

Don’t give up hope. Know the love you have with that departed soul is still strong and alive. Heaven’s not a prison and those dear to you visit you now and then.

If you’ve had a crossed-over loved one make their presence known, please share your stories to help those looking for solace.